It is very normal to feel a great sense of loss after having a miscarriage. Allow yourself to be sad and experience the stages of grief. This is important so that you can cope with it effectively and, later be able to move past the miscarriage emotionally. Most people do not know how to grieve and some feel that they don’t need to grieve. If you don’t grieve then your emotions will build up and explode later in anger or a breakdown. When it comes to grieving after a miscarriage, here is what you need to know about experiencing the loss of a baby.
How Common is Miscarriage?
According to the March of Dimes, as many as 50% of all pregnancies end in miscarriage — most often before a woman misses a menstrual period or even knows she is pregnant. About 15-25% of recognized pregnancies will end in a miscarriage. More than 80% of miscarriages occur within the first three months of pregnancy. Resolve is a great organization that helps people that are struggling with infertility. They provide resources and connections to support groups all over the U.S. ASRM is another great resource that provides educational information about infertility- asrm.org
Ways to Cope With Grieving After a Miscarriage
- Let yourself have a good cry – this helps to release your emotions.
- Talk about your feelings with your partner, a friend, or a counselor.
- Journal – write about your feelings, this can be very therapeutic and it’s a private way to vent.
- Get sleep – take care of yourself by sleeping 8 hours or more per night; a lack of sleep will affect your emotions in a negative way.
- Exercise – make sure you are trying to do this daily, it will release endorphins and naturally make you feel happier.
- Pray and meditate – this can help you to feel hopeful that you will eventually have a baby.
- Remember the baby – plan a private memorial for the baby, buy a ring to remember the baby, or plan your own way to remember the baby.
- Stay healthy – be sure to eat and drink while you are grieving, it is easy to not want to when you are sad, but you need to take care of your health.
- Breathe – google deep breathing exercises that you can do to calm down when you feel upset.
- Be grateful – each day remember what you are grateful for.
- Laugh – use humor with your partner to get each other to laugh to lighten the mood.
- Grieve at your own pace – everyone grieves differently and needs a different amount of time for grieving. Don’t be hard on yourself and tell yourself things like “I shouldn’t still be sad.”
Schedule a free session at Aspire with a counselor to discuss in more depth your feelings that you are experiencing. It will help you to feel more at peace.